Captain's Cabin

Pirate Lord of the Platinum Coast
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Dogs have owners, Cats have staff.
Cleo on the Beach - Dianna
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Friday, April 13, 2007

Happy Special Black Cat Holiday!

Good morning Fuuuurrriends, I have many happy things to share with you today.

First of all, Happy Special Black Cat Holiday. From now on, all Friday the 13th are Special Black Cat Holidays, by declairation of Her Imperial Majesty, Diamond Emerald-Eyes Precious Black Cat, Queen Empress of the Universe and Slayer of Fowl Beasties.

Right now it only all Cat holiday, but I will make more up as I go along.

All Black Cats get special toys, special treats, and lots and lots of special petting and attention today. Because all Cats suffer in the middle ages at the hands of Evil Christian Cat Haters, all Cats may celebrate this holiday, although it is extra special if you are a black Cat or even a mostly black Cat.

Remind your humans to be extra kind to black Cats today, so they will benefit from the luck that Black Cats will give them. Obviously, you do not wish Black Cats to withhold their luck, or even worse, take it away from you, so they must be very kind to Black Cats.

The next order of business is that I make new group on called Diamond's Dubious Distinctions. This is a contest group with a bit of a twist to its tail. We'll be running some odd contests. Winners will get a special black Cat graphic to post on their site. I will post a sample of it to the group homepage as soon as I invent it.

Our first contests will be the Flash Monster Contest and the Great Girth Contest. I know some of you have the prefect entries for these contests, so join up and lets see those pictures! Post, post, post!

I'll be adding new ones as I make them up - although I already have a few made up. I just don't want to overwhelm everyone all at once.

Next my good friends Snarff and Trixie have joined Snarff is a beautiful Himalyan Cat who just went through a very tough time in his life with F.U.S., so he needs lots of love and your friendship. Trixie is a very Caty girl who will leave you laughing with her caustic remarks. Together we be worse than a pack of hyenas.

Make sure you add them and welcome them into all the fun we have at

Human pull her back out last night. Figures, just when I start getting her healthy, so goes and does something again. Anyway, I knead her last night and she is lying there, whimpering about it. "How is sticking your claws in my supposed to make me feel better?"

What? Accupuncture - Ancient Chinese Medicine. Works very well. I surprised she not know this.

I have to get her in shape to go to ballpark tonight. She has fan club at ballpark I hear. I did not know she this popular. It was first game of series against Blue Jays, so we shall see if my vendetta against the species has helped the team out any.

I also notice in baseball program that May 16th is Islands Night with special appearance by Sanibel and Captiva. I think if Sanibel and Captiva going to put in appearance at ballgame, they should rename it PetsPlaces night, but then, humans always get things named wrong.

Bennie, I sorry, but neither Atlanta or Tampa Bay do well in hockey playoffs so far. Our local team starts playoff tonight against Charlotte, which is Rangers Affiliate. Bean was hoping that with Panthers out of playoffs that they would return our goalie, but so far, they have not done this. I suspect it will be short playoff appearance for local team anyway.

I think that about all for today. Enjoy your special Black Cat Holiday and your weekend if I do not purr to you before then.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Video & Storm

Sarah make video of me before, but it still pictures set to music:

Still, it a good video. But it not like she follow me around with camera. Bean was supposed to take still pictures of the Scout Cat, but she press wrong button, so we get 8-Seconds of Cute Cat:

She find out hard way Monday that video can only be five minutes long max or you cannot upload to youtube or photobucket or myspace or yahoo or where ever. So she have two video clips she supposed to edit. BUT, instead of playing with that last night like she supposed to, she decide to take pictures of Scout Cat instead. She very strange. If she figure out the editing, then she can take a decent video of me and not have to worry about "pausing" the camera, she just take several clips and stick them together. Ah well...what's a poor little Cat supposed to do?

It rain this morning. Big Thunderstorm! Power go off in house. I curl up on couch and take cat nap. No big deal. Get these all the time. Bean mildly upset because it knock computer offline while she trying to do scoreboard. She says she needs to get new battery back up, this one not work well.

I stay in today in case it decide to rain again, I don't get wet. Bean walk to work. It not far, only two streets. Sometimes she walk to work I walk with. She not really happy about this, but no one else seems to mind. She calls me Velcro Kitty when I do that. However, she says I do not want to come to office today because it this "tack season" and it very stressful right now. She says after tack season I can come to office and she will take video of me exploring office. I like going to office because nice German lady give me catnips when I go there.

I going to take cap nap now. I be back on computer later.

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Little Tent

Joy to the world!
My tent has come!
I can, hide in, the house now!
My little kitty heart,
Rebounds from gloom!
And all the birdies sing,
(sing, sing, sing)
And All the birdies Sing,
(sing, sing, sing)
And AllLLL the birdies sing!

Bean take camera to baseball game last night to take pictures of Pookie throwing ball, so I will try to post pictures with little tent tonight.

Monday, April 9, 2007

Cat as Deity

Aladdin and Zoe from Myers Zoo use old quote that "Thousands of years ago, Cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this."

This is true, and I say, once a god - or in this case a demigod - then always one. But the story goes something like this.

Cats became domesticated about 5,000 years ago in Egypt. The Egyptians grew a great deal of grain, and the grain attracted mice, rats and other vermin. The mice and rats in turn attracted small African wildCats who came and caught and ate them. The humans found this usefull, and so they began offering tokens to Cats to keep the heads and the like.

So the Cats stick around. Eventually some moved in with people and became household pets.

The Egyptians flourished and grew even more grain, which in turn attracted more vermin. This created a problem because there was more vermin than the working Cats could handle, so the Pharoh, who was considered a living God in Eygpt felt he needed to do something. He knew people would not want to give up their beloved house Cats.

He come up with an idea. Being a God, he declared the Cats Demigods. Since a meer human could not own a Demigod, this made the humans caretakers for the Cats and the Cats in turn actually belong to Pharoh. It was declared that part of the worship of the Cats was to take the Cat to a designated grainery and leave it overnight.

So the Egyptians do this, and the Cats of course, keep the rats in check.

It is well known that the Egyptians also worshiped the Cat Goddess Bastet, who was goddess of love and fertility. Obviously Cats are very loving and we also can have several litters of kittens a year, making us quite the experts on reproduction.

The problem with the worship of Cats is that it was illegal to export them, so it took a while before a few were smuggled out of Egypt and made their way over to Europe. But being very fertile, and having found a steady food supply in rats and mice, they quickly multiplied.

Europeans see the value in Cats as well and they quickly became known as companions of the Norse Godess Freya, and pulled her chariot. Of couse, in order to do this, they must be devine beings, and therefore, Demigods.

All was well until the Christians came along. Nothing against Chevy and other Fuuurrrriends who worship crucified God, but Catholic Church be a real pain in the backend for Cats through the centuries.

Freya was declared a demon and so Cats were also declared a harmfull animal. The executions of the poor Cats that followed nearly wiped out domestic Cat. But Cat Demigod not without power. As the Catholics waged their war against Felines, rats return and this time, they carry bubonic plague.

Humans get so busy dying from plague, that they not plague Cats anymore and of course, being fertile, Cats go forth and multiply again.

Unfortunately, humans still not learn lesson from this. Black Cats, who were especially loved of Bastet - black being a normally occuring mutation in first domestic cats just as they are in current day leopards - were persecuted by Catholic Church. However, enough escape that populations not decline too much from this, for ships needed cats for ocean voyages. Cats migrate to North America this way.

In modern times, we find Chinese people eating Cats and Dogs and because of this they use poison on grains to kill rodents. This poison gets into food suppy and kills Cats and Dogs and causes great pain and suffering to many humans who lose their beloved companions because of this. If Cats and Rat Terrors not treated as food in China and left to do their business, such rodentcides not be necessary and no one else get hurt.

(Diamond still say we should all eat Chinese in turn to make up for tainted foods, they readily available in America in Chinese restaurants. Fair is fair. And humans nothing but tiger meat anyway. I read that in Calvin and Hobbs cartoon.)

If Cats allowed to do their sacred duties and humans understood their roles better as lowly caretaker of Demigod Cat, there would be certainly far less trouble in the world today. (My human worship me quite well. If only she would worship me less with video camera. If she keeps it up, she will get her ankles bitten!)

Learn your lessons from history, and remember then humans, that Cats are Deity and treat them as such, before we sick plague on you again.

Sunday, April 8, 2007

Happy Eastern

What a rip!!!

Ray Old Shepherd Dog bring candy. I look forward to eastern bunny!

Oh well, lots of treats and toys as you can see.

Hoppy Easter

Best toy was pink eastern bunny, now under couch. Perhaps human will fetch for me.

Must learn to work video camera so I can take clip of human fetching.

Did you know that Cat Candy turns sticky after it has been slobbered on?

Saturday, April 7, 2007

Cold and Camera

Well, human did get video camera. She also get new hoodie. She use "plastic" to buy these things.

I have tried hard to get my claws on this "plastic". I need to this shop online. Once I get my claws on this "plastic" I shall be able to have everything I wish delivered straight to house. I will not have to worry about human messing up order by having it shipped ground.

(I still have not get my little tent yet. I shall probably die before my little tent get here. Or at least be too old to hide anymore.)

However, she take this "plastic" away with her when she leaves the house. One of these days though...

Anyway, I was enjoying workout with mousie when she turned the video camera on me. I do not recall giving her permission to record my workout. Needless to say, I stopped very quickly and glared at her until she put camera way. I can see where this is going to create a problem.

Happy, I have enclosed litter box, so she will not be able to video my most private moments. I am really going to need that little tent soon, before I have nervous breakdown caused by human following me around with video camera.

I also wish to say that I believe furrriend Bennie said something about Global Warming. If part of Globe is warming, please let me know so that I can go there, because this part was very cold last night. The only thing that warmed up yesterday was the cat heater.

Cat heater best thing I got this year. I can sleep in front of cat heater and stay nice and toasty warm through long cold night. Bean call it "space heater" but this just a case of humans mis-naming things again.

Obviously, it heats Cat, therefore, it must be a Cat heater.

(I notice, BTW, that books SHE order after she order little tent for me come last night. So she can get books very fast, but my little tent? No, must ship GROUND. Probably Turtle Express or something. Oh well, they Cat books and one has shopping for Cats in it, so perhaps I should not complain too much.)

I also worried now though that with cold weather and snow, Eastern Bunny will not get here Sunday with my Cat Candy. I sure to hope it Alaskan Eastern Bunny, and not put off by cold weather. If it Florida White Eastern Bunny, we might be in trouble.

Friday, April 6, 2007

Happy Easter & Creative Ideas

My goodness I have many furrriends that I must wish Happy Eastern to. If you not on PetsPlaces I did managed to miss you, then I wish you a Happy Eastern and here is your Eastern card:

little chicken

I also write to Eastern Bunnies, but in case I miss the important one...

Dear Eastern Bunny,

This good Cat has been very good Cat this year. Please bring Cat Cat Candy for Eastern. Thank you very much. You very cute bunny.

Your Furrriend,

Diamond Emerald-Eyes Precious Black Cat

My human Bean have some ideas of things to do this weekend, but she lose digital camera. So I wonder...Squirrels get nuts and bury them in yard, remember where they put them and dig them up months later. Diamond Cat remembers which furnitures she loses mousies under and tries to get them out, day after day, month after month.

And human can't keep track of one digital camera? How do humans function in world? They worse than headless chickens sometime.

Anyway, she think maybe she buy new one that also has digital video camera in it. So then she can take video of Cat. Cat would like this, as she could put on profile then and post on Catster too.

(Dear Eastern Bunny, good Cat did NOT hide digital camera from human.)

But since I am thinking of profiles and things to put on them, who do you think has good profile? Who do you think has really good stuff on their profile? What sort of things would you like on your profile but don't know how to do?

Please post links to the profiles so that I can go and look.

There are two groups on PetsPlaces I find that can help out with profiles. These are:

We need cool pics for our pro!
The Paw Society

If you know of any more please let me know.

Meanwhile, human come back from party and say Eli Outfielder say that team will handle slaughter of Blue Jays this year. Well, team lost to Reds in Sarasota last night, and if they cannot beat crumby Reds team they will not be able to handle tough Blue Jays. Diamond will continue her vendetta against Blue Jays until she has knocked them all off.

Then maybe baseball team will win in playoffs.

Have a nice weekend and may Eastern Bunny bring you many good things!

Thursday, April 5, 2007

I want to thank Chris and team for the making of I have been on - am on - several different pet oriented services and is by far the best.

Originally I wanted, but human did not think this was a good idea for a little Cat. There are pets there, but they are spread out and sometimes hard to find. Also there are people that will come and put pornography on good Cat's page for no good reason. So no myspace.

But Pikapet have place there and human learn of Pikapet, so she gets me profile there. I like the idea behind Pikapet. You enter you pet in a contest and you earn points if you win. You also win points for other things like submitting videos and links and for participating on the forums. You can then use those points in reward auction to buy things.

But many people - mainly ill mannered children who need adult supervision - find cute picture on web and "invent" pet, entering pet in contests. This not fair to real pets. Yes there are fake pets on other services, but not to the extent I see on Pikapet.

So, now I say Pikapet should change it's name to Fake-A-Pet, especially as they seem to do nothing to stop this from happening.

Petster is okay, but you cannot really do anything with pages, and the management seems to have vanished. Many teenages running around posting about this dog dating that one, Cats going out with rats and other silly nonsense. There is not sense of building a legitimate online pet community. Most of the groups are dead, and many of the members have not been on in over a year.

Catster, is obviously the place to be if you are a cat, but you cannot communicate really with other cats. There is no way to leave comments on someone's blog or profile page, so it okay to read, but there does not seem to be much in the way of participation. allows you to post comment, but there is no blog and your profile is limited in it's scope. Both services okay, but not really worth catnip mouse.

The only problem I have with PetsPlace - and Misty (Mistygirl) say same thing - is that you cannot make multiple pet pages on each account. Cat must share with dog. However, nothing stops anyone from setting up more than one account, so I don't really see problem except it makes them a little harder to manage.

Fuzzster, I look at this and feel advertising is totally unsuitable for pet service. I not make profile there. PetBoogalo is worthless. Dating services for human with pets, both of them.

Anyway, just my opinion. Chris and team win blue ribbon and takes home best of show!

Wednesday, April 4, 2007

Cuddling and Kittens

Tigger get killed but new Tom Cat move into neighborhood, chocolate lynx point Cat. All night he walk around my house singing "I want to make Kittens" song.

Handsome Cat but I do not make kittens and I not interested in his singing. You think he would catch clue. I swear sometimes I think all males, no brains.

So I cuddle with Bean all night as she keep me safe from marauding Tom Cat. Although I not much of a cuddlebug. Cuddling is something kittens learn at an early age from being handled by humans. Kitten not get lot of handling or get not pleasant handling, do not like being picked up by human.

This why is so hard to tame ferral kittens who are afraid of being handled by human. They never have that before.

I do not like to be picked up much and will only tolerate being held if I do not feel like my legs and feet are trapped. I like to feel like I can walk away if situation not to my liking.

So my idea of cuddling with human is sitting on top of or curling up next to and getting petted. If I sit on top, I will knead human and a lot of times, when I do this I drool a lot. Human call me slobber bucket, but she do it in a nice way and I not get offended.

My human is okay with the way I cuddle. She say when she have Miss Hiss, she the same way. Just like to sit on, not pick up, not held. So we get along okay together. She say Miss Hiss sleep on her though more often, which means either that can more tolerant of her flopping around in bed, or she not flop around as much when she younger.

Human going to party with baseball males tonight. I surprised she not walking around singing the the "I Want to make Kittens" song.

Anyway, Murphy say Torti not have kittens yet, but she getting close. I hope she be okay. Murphy not father, he nuetered, but he acting like expectant father.

I see on Make A Tail Wag store where they have Kitten Shower.

Do you give kitten shower before or after kittens come? Is this for all kittens or just celebri-cats kittens? Should we throw kitten shower for Torti? She probably just want the kittens to come out already, poor thing.

But that's what she gets for listening to singing Tom Cat.

Monday, April 2, 2007

Dry & matings

It has been very interesting weekend. Today we wake up and it smell like fire. I wonder what burning.

It has been very dry. Human and I go to review property to make sure there is no fire hazards on property. Lee County has been placed under a Burn Ban due to dry weather conditions. This does not really affect most people. It mostly means that they can not do burns in the Everglades, and that people that use fires to clear land for building or agriculture may not do this and must use alternative methods.

If you wonder why they would want to burn Everglades, well...humans messed up the natural ecology of the Everglades system which included periods of burning which removes deadwood and puts nutrients back in soil. Because of this, the humans now have to set fires to keep the system running properly. The only good thing of this is that animals used to get caught in the fires. Now with humans banging around in the swamp setting fires, all the animals leave the fire areas and don't get burned up anymore.

Backyard is very dry and human needs to water down grass in back and front with water from hose. I make sure I not around when she does this. All the dry conditions make for lots of dirt to dig in though, so I enjoy much digging. We also find remains of someone in backyard, There not enough left for me to identify coat pattern, so I do not know if I know them or if I ever know them. I can tell they from gray & white bi-color clan, but that is all. I think maybe they not get killed here either, that this is part of remains that racoons drag into yard and leave. Human take care of removal of them, so they not continue to draw scavengers and insects.

She also take pictures of Cat in backyard. She wants Cat do go up in tree, but I do not wish to climb tree and I do not wish her to pick me up and put me in tree, so she disappointed that she cannot do that. Too bad. But there will be new pictures coming of me soon. I do not take easter pictures though. She not putting bunny ears on me. Nor are we getting bunny, although she look at them in Petsco this weekend. I put my paw down on this one. No other animals in house.

Human spend much time at ballpark this weekend as baseball males are in season. I do not understand...I have her fixed last fall which I though was supposed to curb her roaming, but she still insists on going and chasing baseball males. Maybe I have her fixed too late in life and she is still following learned behaviours and will never change. I do not know. Baseball males are okay. I think game boring though. I would rather watch hockey on TV as I try to catch the pucks and sometimes the males too.

In any case, she as bad when baseball males are around as the neighbor cat that was singing the "I want to make kittens" song outside the house Saturday night. I tell you, it much nicer to be fixed and not have to worry about kittens for the making of them. So why human continues to mess with baseball males is beyond me.

She seem to enjoy it though, but then I must let her use computer so that she can post pictures of the baseball males on the internet for other humans to look at.

Friend Torti on Petster is making kittens, and she is NOT happy about it. She will not have another litter after this though, as she is going to be fixed. She has had enough of motherhood!

I find new (at least to me) Cat Community called I know have profile there now, so you can visit me there and leave comment. You can earn points for doing things and then redeem them for gifts, but I warn you, it costs lots of points to get free Cat magazine subcription!

I will write more later as there is more to tell. I want to go check out this fire situation some more though right now.